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Friday, June 16, 2006

LUNG CANCER: PREPARED to DIE!

I really did not think that I would be alive today to be telling you these stories.

Four months ago,I wrote a living will.I also wrote letters to each of my children and my mother.I phoned my dearest friends and tried so hard not to cry when inside we both knew it might be the last time we spoke.
I had come to peace with myself and my God.
I was ready to DIE!

I had already been through this in May of 2002.I was given 3 months to live then ,with the diagnosis of " cirrhosis".
During the last three years I was fighting everyday to get back all my senses of reality again.
I had gone through photo albums and asked friends things that I had forgotten through all the memory black outs in the past.I fought everyday and countless hours to get to where I am today. I had stopped drinking four years ago and have not looked back.My health was back,my liver enzymes had returned to normal and i was all set to go.
Then it happened.DIAGNOSIS: LUNG CANCER:

If you read my previous points you will be up to date on that diagnosis.


So Here I am now,Thank God, at the beginning again.

You can probably imagine the "full Plate " I have now and the tremendous emotions.

In the past 3 years I have had to try to LIVE and DIE!

I have so much more to tell you.
I really hope that I can share with you the real feelings attached to this untalked about" disease".

Hope to hear from you all soon!

B.C.

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