Friday, July 24, 2009

LUNG CANCER:Desperate Times,Desperate Measures

I would like to take you to some emotional and physical aspects on your journey through Lung Cancer.

There are trials and tribulations.This blog is about some of mine,and not necessarily going to be the same as you.

Most of you that visit are living with cancer or know someone who is.Lung Cancer is only one of the cancers out there.Lung Cancer is the leading cause of death .

I had no idea I had lung cancer.Sure,I had been a smoker for a number of years and I had a bad cough,but even then,it just never occurred to me.I guess I thought that I was too young to die and that it only happened to older people.I had also been given a diagnosis of pneumonia for the prior three months.

I didn't cry when the surgeon told me.I just listened to my options.I decided within minutes that I would have the surgery to remove a 2" tumor from my lung.

I was at the hospital two weeks later on an operating table.The surgeon said my odds were not that great to make the operation,as I had high blood pressure,heart disease and liver disease.There was a 20% chance that I would not survive,but I heard in my mind that there was an 80% chance that I would.I liked my way of thinking.

They put me to sleep and that was all there was.I woke up with an array of machinery around me,but I was happy when I saw my husband and I knew I had made it.

I was really cut up though.They had to go in through my back to get the right lobe of the lung.I have a twelve inch scar,that is starting to fade now.I had 21 staples that were the size to build a house.They placed a chest tube to drain any clots that might have formed during the operation.That was the physical extent.They were giving me great medications for the pain ,and I felt normal.The stay after this procedure is usually 7-10 days,I was out in four.

The pathology report came a few weeks later and the diagnosis was stage 1 non small cell bronchial aveolear Cancer,or BAC,as it is known.

The thing was, that this cancer is normally found in people who DO NOT smoke.It is a rare cancer ,accounting for about 14-17% of all cancers.

I was so fortunate to have found the cancer early.I had great doctors and access to some good hospitals.

I now was left with not knowing what was going to happen next.Here we are at the emotional part.

I thought I should get prepared to die.I started to write letters to my sons and my mom and husband.I laid awake at night worrying what they would do without me.I was not scared to die,I just didn't want to hurt them.I guess that is a typical feeling with us women and mothers and wives.

I did not want to be a martyr either.I kept up my smile and didn't let anybody know how I really felt.In fact ,this blog holds my diary through those days.

Please read my posts from beginning to end as they tell this journey in time sequence better than my immediate posts.
Desperate times do call for desperate measures.I know that my disease is fatal.I also thought I would have died three years ago.I am here today because I was well enough to be able to continue my life normally.I know that many others can not.I also really know that when they say "Live for Today",that ,that is the best philosophy, to live by.
I have a lot of other problems arising now that are related to the first diagnosis,of Lung Cancer.I have a scan for a "Brain Tumor" coming in September.I have on going tests for the last three years as well.
Physically I sometimes have challenges,but emotionally,I am learning to deal with it.

Thank You all again for your comments and well wishes,.

So til next time ,Remember



Saturday, July 04, 2009

I Cried because I had no shoes,until....


Yes,I have been crying on here for three years now.I have been reading a lot of lung cancer blogs because it makes me feel like I am not the only one dealing with this disease.I was reading a story about a lady named "Doreen',and she writes a beautiful story.I had no idea how well off I was compared to her and her families problem, and so many others,that are in worse shape than me.

I realise now that some people couldn't even type on here to be able to tell their side of things.

You can read "Dor 's " blogs at
There are lots of great stories there on all types of cancers.
she is listed under lung cancer and her blog is listed as lung cancer survivor 06.
Going back to the title of this story.
I cried because I had no shoes,until I saw a man with no feet.

I will change the subject now and would like to tell you that the CT of my Heart came back NORMAL.
I am so happy about that.I had to kind of laugh though when the heart doctor,of course not realising I had lung cancer,says";You are going to live a long life."That would have been wonderful,but the reality is not that.
I have started getting severe headaches and I am vomiting regularly now.I have one more test to come.I had a CT scan of my Brain scheduled for March.I just didn't want to deal with it then,so I cancelled.
My doctors and me all expect that with my symptoms,I most likely have a "Brain Tumor".
I have just recently found this out.
The pain is so intense in my head that I can't even be in any light , and the sound of a pin dropping would make me screech.
I am just taking aspirin now,but I See my GP in a week and we will go from there,again!

Sad news about "Farrah Fawcett" last week and we also lost "Micheal Jackson".All of us older ones are losing lots of people we cared about.
I would like to Thank You all for bearing with my lack of posts,I will try to keep up more.

Til then...Remember




welcome.It is a blessing to be here with you today. I will begin from the last post .It has been awhile since I posted and hope I can catch...