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Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Keep on Living,If You're Not Prepared to Die

Thanksgiving this year was a meditating one.I thought about all the things I gave thanks for over the years,and some new ones I have added.I am especially Thankful to still be here writing these posts. I started this journal after I was diagnosed with Lung Cancer.I never thought this journey would be that long,and with so many roads to travel.Since my lung cancer diagnosis,I have been diagnosed with Emphysema,cirrhosis of the liver,hypertension,and I have had a heart attack and a stroke.In the last six months I have lost my right kidney.The kidney got blocked and the renal artery couldn't flow properly,I think.My God,you say.How can I still be here after all that?I can't answer that,but I can say I am truly blessed.
I read about others who have lung cancer,that are not as fortunate.I have learned a lot on how others feel when they go through all different cancers.Please check out
http://beingcancer.net
on so many other points of view.Lung Cancer takes you fast and sometimes you are not prepared.I have dealt with fatal diagnosis's since 2002.I believe I have more than prepared myself to die.I just pray I can keep finding a reason to live.
We all have bad days and good days.I have had sorta days of late.When I am having a hard time breathing,I do not feel like doing much,and the sitting around really gets to me.
I am on hold for a huge diagnosis.I see my cancer doctor and my kidney doctor on the same day soon.
I will get a chest xray from my oncologist and it will show immediately if the cancer has returned.I will not even have time to feel the impact of the news,as I have to go upstairs to see the kidney doctor.He will decide,with the recent test results if my kidneys are failing,and whether or not I might have to go on dialysis.Wow!What an emotional day that will be.I already know the kidney isn't good news,but I really don't want to deal with the lung cancer right now.I guess what will be will be.
I will leave you on that note.
Remember til next time

DON'T STOP BELIEVING!

Believe

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